I've Been...

desmasiado frio... translation: too cold. I've been too cold in New Jersey for a couple weeks now, riding out my pre-determined destiny here. It's been what it should be, I've been making it work, but it proves to be more than I know. I always knew that my future lie in the tri-state, but I didn't always know the key to my success would come from the least expected liason. So here I am, freezing my dick off, in dick pants, covered by work pants, wearing four layers over my work coat for weeks, yet the night I derobe my work gear and head out to a power dinner; I find that it not come from my customers at Deal, not from my Goldamn Sachs brother-in-law, but yet from my legacy bearing in advertising father. Well, it comes. A casual dinner, a theoretical conversation, we speak on it, and I sell the better salesman, on what? On me. I sold. He bought. He believes I'm better. Ready to introduce me to the head of the apparently not propaganda Fox News marketing dept., the VP of ABC/ESPN sales, and the local syndicate head of Fox NYC. The prodigal fuckup ready to make the prodigious bucks? Here we are, and there we are. What a world, eh? However, more wild oats need to be sown. A PHX year will not be discounted. A six month Sur American sabbatical will not go without being had. A fuller life will be digested before a house in the hills with moves being made will be had. House in the hills? Big dream for a little guy. After, the initial initiation hard work will be done, but by five years in, I will make it, I will make it big. Hopefully, head of the Latin American Adverising Dept. at an anonymous network--of course after the NAU becomes reality--where cowboy rules will still be allowed and tolerated, so I can enjoy a late 60s, early 70s, Madison Avenue type paradigm, in an albeit more stressful, yet more tropical climate. I guess I'm halfway done to learning Spanish for a reason. Here's to us... and here's to me... Cheers mate.

Good..Bad

I don't know the difference. I drink Cognac with the power brokers of my future, and honestly... I don't know the difference. Martell, Remy, Hine, Korbel, Lairds, shit... I think the difference lies within the amount of success or the amount of money you've attained. It's the drink of choice of the power elite and they don't even fucking know, they say this is good, so I drink it, I use Korbel for cooking, it tastes the same. It's fuck all folks. But I drink with them, they like me, my success is assured as far as they say. I've got what they say you need, I'm good. What do I say? "Mas Cognac por favor". Righty-O and right on! A good night to all, and to all a good night!

So Focused...

on this right now. Just dead smack on. Right at that the point where I love making money, scheming to make more money, and just on the precipice of hating it all at the same time. It's like being in heaven for the weather, but I want to cut away and go to hell for the company, yet it's tough to have both, so I'm stuck with the eternal boredom of heaven. Things are just not fucked up right now, it's kinda cool...
drink break...
go outside...
...back now.
hmmm... outside now. It's pretty cold out here. Got my drink, and it's SOCO! I haven't been able to drink this in years, but I was at my buddy Stank's place a few weeks ago... I was on my way to appoinment fuck this chick, and I stopped in to grab a condom, he had a Magnum Twister, grabbed it; I saw a bottle of SoCo and slugged it, after doing so, I wasn't sick, ok, problem solved. I used to drink so much of that shit, it made me sick to drink it anymore. but i guess a couple years off let it come back... so i drank the SoCo\ I was ready to fuck, then he loaded the Volcano vaporizer, set it to 9, i hit it, i was done. i drove out to her house, stopped at her driveway, realized I was in no state, and went back to Stanks. But if one good thing came, it was the realization of further SoCo consumption, not the more than excessive White Castle consumption that followed... so back to where we were?>
We're at 13 weeks, just thirteen to go, and I'm back in the lazy palm tree driven days. Soon enough I hope, because I fear it's getting too cold for me here, not just weather wise. my goals are set, and shit is getting done, but being cut off from society for extended periods of time are proving to be more difficult than it was in earlier days. I used to just not care, but the past few years have spoiled me. It's ok though, I've done solitude, I've done hate, I've done jail, I've done reliance on exclusive self, I can do this standing on my head. We all need breaks every once and a while; thats just what this is. I think it's good... like sooo good. At least to just get a little perspective on things. Sometimes if you just keep going it's really easy to lose sight of what's real, and just become a lame, a jerk, a monster, or worse.